The Washington Nationals, our favorite dysfunctional baseball team, benched and fined OF Elijah "It Was The" Dukes for arriving late to the ballpark last weekend. Grab some seat, Dukes, rules are rules, the club said. I'm sorry, did you say you were out helping kids at a local Little League field ??? As part of our community outreach program ??? Oh. Um, well, that's still no excuse, late is late. You sit. No, sit. That little old lady can cross the street all by herself.
Speaking of Little League, on Tuesday, 12-year-old Mackenzie Brown pitched a perfect game for her Bayonne, NJ team. That's right, her Little League team. Eighteen Bayonne boys up and 18 Bayonne boys down. And now the New York Mets have invited her to throw out the first pitch before Saturday's home game against the Nats. No truth to the rumor the Mets are praying Mackenzie trips on a loose baseball and breaks her arm so that her tendons heal too tight.
It's a proud day here at Noter Central. Our goal many years ago was to make sure the offspring became lifelong football fans. Mission accomplished. Youngest daughter, now 20, is using her Facebook "What's on your mind?" notice to gripe about the new 5-year contract extension our Carolina Panthers gave to QB Jake Delhomme, last seen delivering playoff picks at bulk mail rates to the Zona Cards. On the same day he signed it too. Hold on, I think there's something in my eye.
Footnote to the Elijah Dukes fine ... The Little Leaguers took up a collection and paid it for him. Kids paying the fine for a multi-millionaire baseball player. Go, Nats. Way to build that fan base, fellas.
If it's spring in Charlotte, it must be time for The Official Annual "Is Tiger Coming Or Not?" Vigil. The PGA Tour is in town next week and every year Elin's husband waits until the very last minute to announce his plans which of course gives everybody here the vapors. I swear if Great Caesar's Ghost himself showed up to play the pro-am in full toga and bite-me Oakleys, they'd still yawn if Tiger wasn't here.
Wait a minute, are those the premium seats that are mostly empty at new Yankee Stadium ??? You mean to tell me that $2,625 was too expensive for the privilege of sitting in one seat for three hours to watch one baseball game ??? I'm shocked, shocked I tell you. And the Mets over in their brand new Bailout Ballpark ... top price $495 a seat ... aren't filling theirs with Big Apple butts either. Not hard to believe, Harry.
Get well soon, Fridge.
See ya next time.
P.S. He's coming !!! Hot damn, he's gonna play. Get in the hole !!!
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